Friendship puzzler #47: You like your new haircut, but a friend told you that another kid said it looks silly. You should:

  1. Say, “Oh, well,” and change the subject.
  2. Crawl on your belly to sneak up on that kid and then leap up and yell, “You haircut bully, you!”
  3. Ask your friend twelve questions to find out exactly what that kid said, when, how, why, who was around, what did that kid mean, what happened next, etc.
  4. Ask everybody you know what they think of your haircut.
  5. Confront the other kid by asking, “Why did you say that mean thing about my hair?”

Answer: A. Definitely don’t confront the other kid! It’s hard to accept, but what someone says behind your back is none of your business. People are entitled to their opinions, and they’re even allowed to express them in private conversations. Your friend shouldn’t have repeated the other kid’s unflattering comment. The important thing is that you like your haircut. But even if you didn’t like how your haircut turned out, there’s no need to focus on everyone else’s opinion. Also, having–and even expressing–different hairstyle preferences is not bullying. It’s not reasonable to think that everyone has to admire your haircut!